Hello, to all my lovelies showing an interest in what we have to say!
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This past weekend we dealt with some 9 year old drama. I'm learning it's just as dramatic as some of you I know have told me it would be...I was holding out hope you were all exaggerating!! Nope, not the case. Girls, can be and in most cases will be mean. This weekend was particularly sad, as I learned a little girl who I don't really know has been being hateful towards my daughter, making her as she says, "feel stupid". When my daughter has something to say or contribute to the conversations she gets told, "we don't care". My daughter wants so badly to be accepted by this girl because she thinks she is "popular". That alone makes me so sad. Being a girl and being the mom of a girl I try to talk to her about knowing her worth so that in situations like these she could stand tall. Well.......that has not been the case. But, we are continuing to work on her identity and especially confident in knowing who God says she is.
Unfortunately, the story gets worse. I find out my daughter was not being so kind to one of her friends whose mom and I are very close. This completely crushed me. I truly believe that when people bully others there is something causing a sadness in them, causing them to make themselves feel better by assuming an authoritative role over someone. In my daughters case, this little girl who she so badly wants to be friends with was causing a hurt in her. Through lots of tears, she told us that she is use to being treated that way and and took it out on her friend treating her the same way she was being treated. Therefore, continuing the bullying cycle that we have talked about so many times I can't even count. It still found its way in our home. We have a zero bullying tolerance in our home, so I immediately acted on it.
After long, heartfelt and heartbreaking conversations she sat for a while trying to find the right words to say to her friend. She wrote down her words and she delivered the note, offered her a hug, and a baggie of marshmallows. Yes, marshmallows. Haha! There was a reason for that, just fyi! Fortunately, she was forgiven and hopefully learned a big lesson after the emotional weekend we had. Lots of tears (me and her, and even though there were no tears from my husband he was so very disappointed and upset) and emotions we didn't know she was dealing with. We ended on positive feelings when she told me in the car after delivering her note and marshmallows, "I feel so much better mom, when my note made her smile". I reiterated over and over that she needs to remember this moment and the power of kindness. Not only does it make the other person feel good, it makes us feel so good!
Last year when she as coming home talking about all the drama going on with her and her friends I decided to get a group of girls together to take them to do random acts of kindness to people in our community (photos below). I know how good it feels when you get to make a difference in someones day and was hoping the same effect would take place in these 3rd grade girls. We handed out $5 Starbucks cards to people in the Starbucks line and one man was so touched by that, that he chose to do the same for another customer in the store. That was the lesson I was so hoping they would learn. The chain reaction that can happen when you extend kindness to someone. Kindness can be contagious. They offered to put customer's carts up for them at Target after they were done loading their cars, they handed out little toys to kids while I took them for dinner, and taped baggies of quarters on vending machines, we talked about how important it is to build each other up, instead of tearing each other down. They loved every second and they decided they wanted to name the group, "Girls Kindness Club".
To take this particular experience one step further, I have decided to plan a workshop at the store for this exact topic. Our girls need it so bad. I will not have a child who continues the bullying cycle, and will pull out all the stops I can to prevent and stop that behavior. It may have started with someone else, but it will end with my daughter.
So, if you are reading this, and you have an elementary age daughter we would love for you to bring her to our Girls Empowerment workshop where we hope we can teach them to build each other up, encourage one another, and know their worth so that they can stand firm against bullying, making the cycle stop. And some fun activities! An elementary school counselor is bringing material for us to discuss and hoping to stay and talk to the girls and share her area of expertise.
Our girls are too precious to feel anything but, so I hope you join us in helping them see themselves, just how special they truly are.
DATE AND TIME DETAILS TO COME ON SOCIAL MEDIA!